In our home our stress management techniques are pretty vocal. We have the tendency to use our hands to express our feelings and we all have a vigorous, and recognisable, vocal range – there’s a particular “ Uumph” as the generations shimmy off to another (better) room!
Aside from giving you a peek into the decibel possibilities of my home – what’s this got to do with anything? Actually lots, because it causes me to share what I know about the other end of the spectrum – the epidemic of Silent Overwhelm – people who are experiencing extreme stress and overwhelm yet remain silent. Those people who are bearing so much yet silently crying on the inside.
At my recent workshop on Ditch Overwhelm, we discussed this, and it was almost unanimous from the audience, that there are a lot of people who feel silently overwhelmed. Everything they are feeling is bottled up inside them – so much so that they often feel defeated and not “heard’. From my years practising psychology I know this can lead to many more serious emotional experiences like:
- sadness/reduced happiness levels
- low energy/ reduced physical health
- Less “sass’ /libido/zest for life
- emotional distress
- social isolation
- Low self-esteem and reduced confidence.
On the tail of that, people don’t feel they are performing well at work – and thus the cycle spirals downwards….
What is Silent Overwhelm?
Over the years I’ve learnt a lot about silent overwhelm from my clients and from other clinical and personal experience with men and women who have been tormented by the muffled, and often silenced, screams of frustration, overwhelm and ‘stuckness’.
Most feel it’s better (whilst being painful) to remain silent and this is usually due to feeling ashamed or fearful that others will see them as failures or as inadequate.
Now, whilst the continually screaming shrew is not attractive or desirable in the office or lounge room, the overwhelmed and silent person who deeply needs to recognize what’s happening and seek relief is causing possible deep harm to themselves and others. Their silence can impact everything from their health and happiness at home and at work.
So what can we do about silent overwhelm?
If you have ever experienced silent overwhelm can I say: “I hear you and you are not definitely not alone! In fact there are thousands of people just like you. There are great stress management techniques at hand … if you just ask”.
Here are five practical tips that can help you get over silent overwhelm and reduce your stress today:
1. Take a breath
Literally take 5 deep breaths in and out. It is the best way to manage stress in your body and reduce the physical feelings of overwhelm you might be experiencing. If you would like some guidance on how to do this, please click here to download my Ditch Overwhelm guide to help you calm down within 5 minutes
2. Become aware
Are you aware of your pattern of silence? Ask yourself: “Am I feeling overwhelmed and bearing it silently?
3. Ask what do I gain from this?
What do I think/feel I might gain by this silent approach to my suffering?
4. Ask what is keeping me trapped in this space?
What fears are stopping me from asking for help? Are my fears real or imagined?
5. Reach out
Is there one person I could speak to – to help me deal with this situation?
I hope if you are experiencing silent overwhelm that these tips will help you. If you suffer silently please reach out. And if you see someone silently suffering with overwhelm please reach out to them. It would mean the world to them.
This blog takes a peek into the tip of very positive possibilities to reduce the epidemic of Silent Overwhelm. I’ll be sharing more in the future on this – it’s serious and probably affects people you care about.
In the meantime, if you’d like to learn how to breathe correctly, beat overwhelm and get your life back download my free 5-minute guide: Ditch Overwhelm – 2 Simple Steps to Create Calm, Boost Your Energy, Anywhere, Anytime.
The technique I teach in Ditch Overwhelm has helped hundreds of other women and men that I have worked with.
Ditch Overwhelm is also the first step in my Revitalize You program, which helps women, feel happier, more energised and more balanced.
As you download Ditch Overwhelm I wish you luck in using it to create some more calm and energy in your life right now.
Want to reduce overwhelm and start feeling more energy now?
Download our free 5 minute guide: Ditch Overwhelm – 2 Simple Steps to Get Calm and Boost Your Energy, Anywhere, Anytime